Every year on January 1st, I take a moment to contemplate and write down what I would like to accomplish during this year. As we all know, these are called New Year Resolutions and a lot of people make them. They make them to lose weight, to get a new job, to start a hobby …the list goes on and on. Most of the time, my resolutions follow those same themes. This year though, during my time of reflection I thought about what I want to do, to grow, to better myself… to overall be a good human, and then I had a “duh” moment where I thought: “Well, Ashland, you should always be a good human!”
I know that you’re thinking the same thing; that being a good human should be obvious. However, when I say, “good human”, I don’t mean the obvious things such as ‘don’t steal, murder or lie’. I mean purposely trying every day to consciously do the right thing. Choosing to NOT have the last word when you are in that heated argument, picking up that paper towel that you see on the floor, telling someone that they look beautiful instead of letting jealousy stop you, respecting someone’s opinion and NOT trying to “one-up” them, being okay with saying “what does that mean” and saying “I don’t know” instead of feeling stupid for not knowing.
Some may say, “well this is easy enough” but those that choose to dig deeper will see that, upon some inner reflection, we all have our own demons that we struggle with. I know personally, I struggle with caring too much about what people think of me. I used to stay up all night, worrying about something I said; that I may have offended someone and thinking all night long what they must think of me for saying it and how I should fix it. I have been working on it for the last couple years and now since becoming a Mother, have found that it has become a LOT easier to let things go and not obsess so much over them. I am human though and I do fall down time-to-time but find that it happens less the more I focus on consciously changing the behavior on being on purpose!
So this year, I want to consciously be on purpose! I want to be raw! I want to be “me” and work on not giving so much energy in areas that don’t serve me well. I do wholeheartedly believe that I am only able to do this by also being a good human! Being humble, being okay with saying “I don’t know” or with saying “I don’t agree with that” with confidence; not worrying if they will think I am unintelligent, or uneducated or even if I may offend them. Not allowing pride to stop me from changing my opinion when someone makes a good point. I follow a brand on Instagram called “Weestructed” and they sell a shirt for parents that say “Raise Good Humans.” When I saw this for the first time, I thought, “how simple, but how ingenious that is!” I think living in the world we live in, stressing about raising our kids with a good diet, a good education, clothes, toys etc… we do have to have that simple reminder as parents to “Raise Good Humans.” That should be the first goal for us as parents! But, before we can do that… we need to consciously be a good human ourselves!
Being a Mom has truly changed me; and now more then ever I have a lot more to work on and my resolutions have definitely shifted from being self-serving to being self-less and making goals for my Son. With that being said, above all resolutions this year the first resolution for me is to be a the best Mother I can be, and the way I can start that is by being a “Good Human.”